Ever see something and think “wow that’s dangerously American”

"Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras" (jegoingout)
06/26/2019 at 11:34 • Filed to: None

Well here you go...free bible, american flag, and shotgun with the purchase of a vehicle from these guys down in nice ol Alabama

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DISCUSSION (44)

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
06/26/2019 at 11:36

Link in case of kinja

https://www.thedrive.com/news/28708/alabama-ford-dealer-includes-american-flag-bible-shotgun-with-every-vehicle-purchase

benn454 > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
06/26/2019 at 11:38

It's Alabama. What do you expect?

For Sweden > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
06/26/2019 at 11:39

And for those concerned, Chatom Ford isn’t just handing a shotgun to any customer that wanders in. They’re instead given a certificate that’s valid at local firearm shops which will only give you what’s yours if you’re 18 years old and can legally own said weapon.

duurtlang > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
06/26/2019 at 11:39

They should throw in a big mac as well .

Ash78, voting early and often > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
06/26/2019 at 11:40

A couple quick things — I’ve lived in AL for 25 years and have never heard of this place. Also, when places do stuff like this, it’s tongue-in-cheek for the media attention and ensuing firestorm of internet people.

Mission accomplished, eh?

user314 > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
06/26/2019 at 11:41

Eh, I don’t see the problem.

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > Ash78, voting early and often
06/26/2019 at 11:41

Mission accomplished

farscythe - makin da cawfee! > For Sweden
06/26/2019 at 11:41

sooo... pretty much any customer that wanders in

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > duurtlang
06/26/2019 at 11:41

With a diet coke

For Sweden > farscythe - makin da cawfee!
06/26/2019 at 11:43

Probably! I doubt most customers at Chatom Ford are potential murderers.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
06/26/2019 at 11:43

It's violently American

facw > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
06/26/2019 at 11:43

Yeah, earlier this morning:

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Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > user314
06/26/2019 at 11:43

Any customer that walks in basically

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > facw
06/26/2019 at 11:44

Dammit...i knew i should’ve browsed a little more

Tripper > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
06/26/2019 at 11:44

The perfect gift for newlywed siblings ! It’s a shame that there is only one set of grand parents to bare the financial burden...

WilliamsSW > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
06/26/2019 at 11:50

Super size FREEDOM FRIES

Svend > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
06/26/2019 at 11:54

Lol. That’s the other American key phrase, ‘mission’. American police, fire ambulance, plumbers, electricians, etc... ‘our mission is to change all the light fittings in this house’.

Mission? Really?

U.K. military , ‘our job is to make sure the people are safe, fed and watered while we help deal with the disaster that unfolded on the population here last week’.

Lol.

CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
06/26/2019 at 11:56

Yes. You should have seen the Chicken and Waffles we had at the PNW oppo meet on the weekend.

I actually felt it was unsafe to drive after and had to sit in a coffee shop. SO MUCH FOOD, I WAS IMPAIRED.

Svend > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
06/26/2019 at 11:59

Cue chants of ‘ U.S.A., U.S.A., U.S.A.’, or ‘America Fuck Yeah’, etc...

wafflesnfalafel > Ash78, voting early and often
06/26/2019 at 12:01

all press is good press

Wacko > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
06/26/2019 at 12:03

so that explains this one

https://oppositelock.kinja.com/just-another-day-in-america-1835873058

CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever > Ash78, voting early and often
06/26/2019 at 12:11

You live in Alabama?

huh

My X-type is too a real Jaguar > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
06/26/2019 at 12:16

And his promotion has worked beautifully millions of people now know about his dealership from around the world, he’ll probably sell a few more trucks locally to people who would have shopped the bigger volume dealers over the holiday weekend in the cities. At a dealership that size selling 10 more trucks than last year would be a huge win. So yup that worked so well thanks to outrage.

Ash78, voting early and often > Svend
06/26/2019 at 12:24

Every single institution — public, private, you name it — has “mission” and “vision” statements for everything.

I find it silly, so “mission accomplished” is one of my favorite satirical phrases for everything.

Ash78, voting early and often > CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever
06/26/2019 at 12:25

Yep! Let’s just say our populace varies extremely wildly, more so than most of the industrialized world.

CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever > Ash78, voting early and often
06/26/2019 at 12:31

Can I ask something? What tourist attractions are there in Alabama or what would be a good place to visit?

DipodomysDeserti > Svend
06/26/2019 at 12:37

Well, if Europe hadn’t of sent all those MISSIONaries over here we wouldn’t be in this mess.

Ash78, voting early and often > CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever
06/26/2019 at 12:38

The tourism here is more local/regional, so you’re not going to find much to justify a trip on its own. But we have at least 4 distinct regions, each with a medium-sized city in it. The state is about 6 hours of driving from north to south.

South: Mobile — like a smaller-scale version of New Orleans, hundreds of years of history from Spain, France, and England, plus lots of native American history and slave trade stuff. Basically a typical port city. LOTS of fantastic beaches around there, easily among the best in the US.

Middle: Montgomery — former capital of the Confederacy, so there is plenty of general US history, but also background for the war and secession. Also, lots of civil rights history due to being one of the epicenters of MLK’s work.

North/Middle: Birmingham — 1.3 million people in the area (where I live). Lots of outdoor activities, plenty of industrial and mining/refining history (early 20th century steel & iron hub). Too much to cover in a post, but we’ve got a little bit of everything. Also lots of civil rights stuff here, including a great museum.

Far north: Huntsville — ground zero for the Gemini and Apollo mission research and development (Wehr ner Von Braun and his team) with an excellent space center. Also a huge research/tech/science hub. Being a smaller city, there’s not a ton to do, but all around there is plenty of outdoor stuff.

Also, we have the most lakefront per capita of any US state, so boating/fishing are huge. Golf is amazing and very affordable.

That’s the 5-minute version from memory...

Svend > Ash78, voting early and often
06/26/2019 at 12:41

Lol. Ye’, ‘ our mission is to look after the emergency medical health of our patients’. No mate, you JOB, is to do your very best with the training you have been given to maintain the lives of your patients the very best you can.

I’ve had, ‘thank you for your service’, from Americans beca u se I was eight years in the ambulance service. As a Brit, for many of us it’s, ‘yeah. sure thinks I guess’. But to us, it’s a job, it’s something we did or do and for some of us it’s why we stopped doing it.

Ash78, voting early and often > Svend
06/26/2019 at 12:43

“Thank you for your service” is usually reserved for the military, but also sometimes for “anyone doing an honorable job that you would never want to do”

I should probably thank teachers more, but I’m kind of sick of their sob stories.

Svend > DipodomysDeserti
06/26/2019 at 12:43

Lol.

We didn’t send them, they went of their own volition. They fled the religious freedom Europe was giving people.

Svend > Ash78, voting early and often
06/26/2019 at 12:51

Lol. I’ve two friends (actually ye’, I only have two friends, Lol) who are both teachers. They get a really good wage and benefits here. They get a lot of holiday but they also talk in ‘terms’. As in, ‘ I’ll see you at half term’. Ye’, I’m 39 mate, I’ve not been to school for 20 years, I don’t have kids, how about we use the regular Gregorian calendar because talking in terms, makes no sense at all to me!’.

Grindintosecond > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
06/26/2019 at 12:51

What, so we can buy a truck, wave the flag, and skeet shoot the Bible cause we don't know what it really says? (Or might disapprove of the king James version having manufacture in parliament around what became guy Fawkes day?)

Ash78, voting early and often > Svend
06/26/2019 at 12:58

In the US you’ll hear about low teacher wages, but it’s a bit misleading. When I was starting out (with 2 degrees and looking for a job) I couldn’t even find anything that paid as much as teacher-level wages. 10-15 years later, though, the private sector tends to promote you far more than teachers, so in the long run it’s still a lower wage for them compared to many jobs.

But IMHO, teaching has to be a calling — it’s like social work, you don’t go into it for the money, that’s just a side benefit . That’s what I see in everyday life, too...most teachers are married women in a home with two incomes, so their wages are not as crucial as single people, or as primary earners. Further, they get about 4x the vacation time of most people. Yes, it’s a hard job (for me) and easy for others. They also get to retire after 20 years, while the rest of us work ~40 years. But in the US, there’s this overarching dialogue about “underpaid teachers!” that realistically only applies to some of them. It gets tiring.

diplodicus forgot his password > CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever
06/26/2019 at 13:13

There’s a giant rocket on i-65 just south of the Tennessee border.

The best pickles I’ve had in my entire life are at sweet alices in Clanton, the porks ok. Hopefully the kitten found its mom.

diplodicus forgot his password > Ash78, voting early and often
06/26/2019 at 13:22

Hmm I’m skeptical about the lake front per capita but can’t find any stats for lake frontage for any states.

I would think Minnesota would be #1 given there mid pack population and 10000 lakes.

Have you tried sweet alices pickles in C lanton?

Svend > Ash78, voting early and often
06/26/2019 at 13:27

Ye’, I couldn’t be a teacher for all the money in the world.

My two friends are a married couple, both teachers of junior grade (up to 11 year old) in Lancashire.

DipodomysDeserti > Svend
06/26/2019 at 13:43

Depends on what missionaries you’re referring to. The European missionaries who first set up shop in my AO carried swords, spoke Spanish, and were killing off Jews and non-approved Christians in their homeland.

Svend > DipodomysDeserti
06/26/2019 at 13:47

The ones from the U.K. were fleeing religious persecution freedom. Lol.

The ones sent from the U.K. were prisoners, hence why Australia became a penal colony after America got independence.

Ash78, voting early and often > diplodicus forgot his password
06/26/2019 at 13:48

The lakefront thing always bothered me, too, but I think I figured it out.

Minnesota: Mostly natural lakes with smoother edges.

Alabama: Mostly manmade lakes with ridiculously undulating edges.

So yeah, it’s a bit of a stretch, but every third person I’ve ever met here has some kind of a lake house.

functionoverfashion > Ash78, voting early and often
06/26/2019 at 13:59

Kind of like how Maine has something like 3,000 miles of coastline.

BaconSandwich is tasty. > Tripper
06/26/2019 at 14:24

That honestly made me laugh out loud.

DipodomysDeserti > Svend
06/26/2019 at 14:29

The first English settlers came with the Virginia Company of London for economic purposes. But most didn’t know what they were doing and either died or went to live with the natives. The religious nuts soon followed after.

I’m only a third generation American, so none of my ancestors were here for any of that.

pip bip - choose Corrour > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
06/27/2019 at 05:16

i’m ok with the free bible and flag.

but the gun is too much